A (Fill in the Blank) Walks in to a Bar Jokes Part 3

More variations on the classic “A Guy Walked in to a Bar” joke:Dog wearing Groucho Glasses

  1. A dog walks in to a bar and hops up on a stool. He looks at the bartender and says, “How about a drink?” The bartender, surprised to see a talking dog, thinks for a moment and says, “Sure, the toilet is in the back on the left”.
  2. A contruction worker walks in to a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says to the bartender,”A beer, please, and one for the road.”
  3. A grasshopper walks into a bar. The barman looks at him and says, “Did you know there’s a drink named after you?” “Really?’” says the grasshopper. “There’s a drink called Jiminy?”
  4. A pilot walks in to a bar. He asks the bartender, “Do you have any helicopter-flavored potato chips?” “Nope” says the bartender. “We only have plane.”
  5. A penguin walks in to a bar and says to the bartender,”Have you seen my close up of grasshopperbrother?” The bartender says,”No. What’s he look like?”
  6. Julius Caesar walks in to a bar.and says I’ll have a martinus. Don’t you mean a martini? If I wanted a double I would have asked for it.
  7. The barman says: “We don’t serve faster-than-light particles here.” A tachyon enters a bar.
  8. Jesus walks in to a bar and asks for a glass of water.
  9. 3 logicians walk in to a bar. The bartender asks,”Do all of you want a drink?” The first logician says, “I don’t know.” the second logician says, “I don’t know.”, the third logician says, “Yes!”
  10.  A bear walks in to a bar and says to the bartender,”I’ll have a gin and…..(he hesitates for a few seconds)….tonic.” The bartender asks, “Why such a big pause?” the bear replies,”I dunno. I’ve always had them!”

Are these bar jokes your cup of tea? Check out A (Fill in the Blank) Walks in to a Bar Jokes” Part 1 and Part 2! And do send us any that we have missed!

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photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/dklimke/1013970146/”>dklimke</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/2.0/”>cc</a>

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/57402879@N00/220437975″>Grasshopper</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.0/”>(license)</a>

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