Monthly Archives: November 2015

Sixteen Super Sassy Santa Jokes

Why does Santa have 3 gardens? So he can ho-ho-ho! Why don’t you ever see Santa Claus in hospital? He has private elf care! Why doesn’t Santa smoke his pipe any more? It’s bad for his elf! What does Santa call … Continue reading

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The Day After Thanksgiving Day Quotes

Ahhhhh! My favorite day of the holiday season is the day after Thanksgiving. Our refrigerator is brimming with leftovers, I usually stay home and sleep in….. and Christmas seems a long way off. No stress and plenty of food! If … Continue reading

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Gobble Up These Thanksgiving Day Jokes!

What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving? The letter ‘G’! Where does Christmas come before Thanksgiving? In the dictionary! Which vegetables go best with turkey? Beets me! What is the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner? The TURKEY! Where … Continue reading

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Football Quotes

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. Erma Bombeck Football players, like prostitutes, are in the business of ruining their bodies for the pleasure of strangers.  Merle Kessler The reason women … Continue reading

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Knock Knock Jokes- Don’t Knock Them!

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Midas. Midas who? Midas well open the door! Knock Knock! Who’s there? Cargo. Cargo who? Cargo,”beep beep”! Knock Knock! Who’s there? Rhoda. Rhoda who? Rhoda boat as fast as you can! Knock Knock! Who’s there? Ears. … Continue reading

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Ahhhhh! Autumn Quotes

Autumn carries more gold in its pocket than all the other seasons. Jim Bishop Winter is dead; spring is crazy; summer is cheerful and autumn is wise! Mehmet Murat ildan Dull November brings the blast, Then the leaves are whirling … Continue reading

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Malapropism Mayhem: Archie Bunker’s Chaotic Communications

Archie Bunker, the cranky patriarch in the 1970’s sitcom, “All in the Family” was well-known for mangling the English language. He was particularly skilled at malapropisms (misusing words that are similar in sound). We recently posted All in Good Fun: … Continue reading

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From The Couch: Psychiatry & Psychology Jokes

Why was Pavlov’s hair so soft? Classic conditioning! A man was lying in the street beaten and bloody. A psychiatrist ran up to the man and exclaimed,”Holy cow! Whoever did this really needs help!” A man goes to a psychiatrist … Continue reading

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Add a Little Color to Your Life: Adult Coloring Books and Quotes About Colors

Why do two colors, put one next to the other, sing? Can one really explain this? No. Pablo Picasso If you want an interesting party sometime, combine cocktails and a fresh box of crayons for everyone. Robert Fulghum
 Beauty without … Continue reading

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A (Fill in the Blank) Walks in to a Bar Jokes Part 3

More variations on the classic “A Guy Walked in to a Bar” joke: A dog walks in to a bar and hops up on a stool. He looks at the bartender and says, “How about a drink?” The bartender, surprised … Continue reading

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