Monthly Archives: April 2013

Knock Knock! Who’s There? Bacon. Bacon Who?

Bacon a cake for your birthday! Knock Knock! Who’s there? Omelet. Omelet who? Omelet smarter than I look! Knock Knock! Who’s there? Ice Cream Ice cream who? Ice cream every time I see a ghost Knock Knock! Who’s there? Doughnut. … Continue reading

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Final Exams Got You Down? Let Albert Einstein Cheer You Up!

How is it possible that a man whose name is synonymous with genius can make me feel so good about myself? Here’s a few of my favorite quotes by Albert Einstein for all those suffering through final exams: A person … Continue reading

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Decoding Real Estate Ad Terms

Ah the spring! As soon as the first daffodil blooms, the open houses begin. Here’s a helpful guide to deciphering those flowery real estate ads: Rustic Charm– snakes under the porch Build Sweat Equity – house is not inhabitable Quiet … Continue reading

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You Got What? Wedding Gift Disasters by Maribel Wright

Every bride is thankful for the wedding gifts they receive. Most of us agree that sharing the wedding day with friends and family is more important than receiving gifts but sometimes you have to wonder…”What were they thinking”? If you’re … Continue reading

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Earth Day Jokes: How Do Trees Get on the Internet?

They LOG in!  Here are a few more green-tinged jokes to celebrate Earth Day: What do you tell a rain forest that is about to be cut down? Run, Forest, Run! Have you heard the one about the recycling bin with … Continue reading

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Remembering George Carlin on Earth Day

Who could forget George Carlin singing this: “Oh Beautiful for smoggy skies, insecticided grain, For strip-mined mountain’s majesty above the asphalt plain. America, America, man sheds his waste on thee, And hides the pines with billboard signs, from sea to … Continue reading

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Nancy Drew and Nick Nickerson Call it Quits after 60 Years

Teenage sweethearts, Nancy Drew and Nick Nickerson have decided to separate after 60 years of courtship. A spokesperson for Ms Drew claimed the split was amicable and cited irreconcilable differences. A source close to Mr. Nickerson hinted that Nancy’s relationship … Continue reading

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What’s the Difference Between Tax Avoidance & Tax Evasion?

 Jail! Here’s a few more jokes to take the sting out of Tax Day: What’s the definition of a good tax accountant? Someone who has a loophole named after him. Where do homeless accountants live? In a tax shelter! (Thank you, … Continue reading

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A Gargoyle Applies for a Job as a Night Watchman

M. Firebrand: Hi, thanks for having me. M. Salopard: According to your resume the pleasure is all mine, Monsieur…. M. Firebrand: Firebrand. M. Salopard: M. Firebrand. Of course. Let’s begin the interview, shall we? Tell me, M. Firebrand- why have … Continue reading

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Taxes! Quotes & Quips!

T. S. Eliot begins best known poem, “The Wasteland” with, ‘April is the cruellest month…’ . No, he wasn’t referring to Tax Day in the US of A, but if it weren’t for the abundance of spring flowers we might … Continue reading

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