Fore! Golf Quotes

  • Golf is a good walk spoiled. Mark Twain 
  • I’m not feeling very well – I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course! Groucho Marx 
  • While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake. Henny Youngman 
  • For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball. Dave Barry 
  • I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone’s golf game. It’s called an eraser. Arnold Palmer 
  • I’ve had a good day when I don’t fall out of the cart. Buddy Hackett
  • The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing. Phyllis Diller
  • After all these years, it’s still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye. Chi Chi Rodriguez
  • I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. Gerald R. Ford
  • The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. Will Rogers

 

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