The Top Ten Best Christmas Jokes Ever!

These are my favorites:santa claus

  1. Why doesn’t Santa Claus buy Christmas Seals? He doesn’t know what to feed them!
  2. What’s the best thing to give your parents for Christmas? A list of everything you want!
  3. What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish!
  4. Why does Santa always go down the chimney? Because it soots him!
  5. What did the Gingerbread man put on his bed? Cookie sheets!
  6. What do you  call an elf who just won the lottery? Welfy!
  7. Which reindeer has the cleanest antlers? Comet!
  8. Why did the Christmas cookie go to the doctor? He was feeling crummy!
  9. What do you call a bunch of chess grandmasters bragging about their games in the lobby of a hotel? Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!
  10. How do you make a fool laugh on Boxing Day? Tell him a joke on Christmas!

There you go! Did I miss any?

Mirth in a Box sells funny and unusual care packages and gifts(yeah stocking stuffers!).

photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/makelessnoise/2130928247/”>makelessnoise</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>cc</a>

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One Liners About Toys From My Favorite Comedians

  • I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio. Rodney 1960's Barbie DollsDangerfield
  • I don’t think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib. Woody Allen
  • Little girls love dolls. They just don’t love doll clothes. We’ve got four thousand dolls and ain’t one of them got a stitch of clothes on. Jeff Foxworthy
  • When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord doesn’t work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me. Emo Philips
  • If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? Steven Wright
  • Apparently the new high-tech Star Wars toys will be in stores any day now. The toys can talk and are interactive, so they can be easily distinguished from Star Wars fans. Conan O’Brien
  • I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying,”Toys not included’. Bernard Manning
  • vacuform_advertWhen I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, ‘Do you have any toy train schedules?’ Steven Wright

Yeah. Well, my favorite toy when I was a kid was my Vac-U-Form. Seems like a lawsuit waiting to happen now. What was your favorite childhood toy?

Mirth in a Box sells fun care packages. During the holidays, people find us a great source for small toys and games to put in Christmas stockings! Really!

photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/romitagirl67/12681286735/”>RomitaGirl67</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>cc</a>

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Need Last Minute Stocking Stuffers Ideas? See Our Top 10!

nail brush for gardenersWe’re closing in on Christmas 2014! Are you done with your shopping? If not, maybe a look at what’s been popular at Mirth in a Box will give you a few ideas. In the Christmas Stocking Stuffer Category, here’s a look our top ten best sellers:carabineer with screw drivers and bottle opener

      • Hedgehog Nail Brushes
      • Google Eye Luggage tags
      • Karma
      • Travel Laundry Bag
      • Euro Magnets (OMG, LOL, WTF)
      • Key Toolshangover eye mask
      • Rainbow Head Massager
      • Recoil Rewinders
      • Geek Eye Masks
      • Classic Sounds Noise Maker

Any surprises? map laundry bag

Order by Sat Dec 20th for Wednesday Dec 24th delivery. We’ll be shipping USPS priority.

Mirth in a Box has some of the best stocking stuffers on the web!

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Hark! Christmas Jokes!

  • What’s white, red and blue at Christmas time?
 A sad candy cane!Christmas Lights
  • What does Santa clean his sleigh with? 
Comet!
  • How was Santa fired?
He was given the sack!
  • What did the grape say to the raisin?
‘Tis the season to be jelly!
  • What is a skunk’s favorite holiday song? 
Jingle Smells!
  • What is Tarzan’s favorite Christmas Carol? Jungle Bells! 
  • Gingerbread MenHow much did Santa pay for his flying sleigh?
 Nothing, it was on the house!
  • Why did the gingerbread man go to the doctor?
He was feeling crummy!
  • What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
 A cookie sheet!
  • Why doesn’t the elf buy Christmas Seals? He doesn’t know what to feed them!

Yes! It’s almost time for Christmas! Make shopping for those stocking stuffers fun and easy! Visit Mirth in a Box and load up on laughter!

photo credits: Gingerbreads- photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/casadamamaegansa/1752814474/”>A PATA MADRINHA ®</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/2.0/”>cc</a> Xmas lights: photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/mcbeth/74350583/”>McBeth</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>cc</a>

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The Holiday Office Party: RSVP Yes or No?

Ahhhhh. I don’t really have an office party any more. Do you?holiday party office

  • What I don’t like about Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day. Phyllis Diller
  • Christmas begins about the first of December with an office party and ends when you finally realize what you spent, around April 15th of the next year. PJ O’ Rourke
  • You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you’re not ‘professional’ any more. Jeff Foxworthy (good to know!)

Do you have an office party this time of year? Do you look forward to it…or dread it? If you are having a White Elephant Swap, see last week’s post on how to run it.

Mirth in a Box sells gifts that would be swell presents for your office mates….or if you have a gift exchange. Just saying. We also have the best care packages in the world!

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My Christmas Lists: c1964 and 2014

Christmas List

Here’s this year’s list:

Christmas list

How have your Christmas lists changed over the years?

Mirth in a Box is a great place to get gift giving inspiration! And while you are there, check out our stocking stuffers!

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Elves! We’re Not Laughing At You, We’re Laughing With You! Short Jokes

  • What do elves use to make sandwiches? Shortbread! Sassy Elf
  • What did the reindeer say when he saw an elf? Nothing, reindeers can’t talk!
  • What do Santa’s elves do after school? Their gnomework!
  • Where do you find elves? 
Depends where you left them!
  • What do you call an elf that tells silly jokes? A real Christmas card!
  • What would you call an elf who just has won the lottery? Welfy!

Want more Elf Jokes? See Elf Jokes: Naughty and Nice.

Step right up and get your stocking stuffers at Mirth in a Box!

Thanks, PhotoPin, for the photo! photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/armadillo444/5331872322/”>armadillo444</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.0/”>cc</a>

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Games! Tis the Season! Quotes About Games

My number one favorite thing to do over the holidays is play games…followed closely by eating while playing games.chess

  • It is impossible to win gracefully at chess. No man has yet said “Mate!” in a voice which failed to sound to his opponent bitter, boastful and malicious. A.A. Milne
  • Games lubricate the body and the mind. Benjamin Franklin
  • I must complain the cards are ill shuffled,  till  I have a good hand. Jonathan Swift
  • My computer beat me at checkers, but I sure beat it at kickboxing. Emo Philipscamp care package idea
  • I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly. Steven Wright

Some of our family’s favorite games are Skipboo, Uno, Boggle, Bananagrams, Farkel and Cribbage. Sometime we play Charades. Sometimes Cutthroat. Which are you favorite games?

Mirth in a Box sells fun care packages but we also sell plenty of games! Check them out!

photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/yeahbouyee/11787236654/”>yeahbouyee</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>cc</a>

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How to Make Sure Your Yankee Swap Doesn’t Suck!

When was the last time you went to a Yankee Swap aka Holiday Gift Exchange aka bad giftDirty Santa Swap aka White Elephant Exchange ? Thumbs up or down?

If you live in the United States, you’ve been subjected to a Yankee Swap. The first time I participated in one, I had a blast. After a few more I saw how wrong they could go. In the interest of good cheer, I will add my 2 cents on how to have a fun-filled gift exchange.

laughterThe Rules: Everybody brings an unmarked, wrapped gift. Strict price parameters should be set ahead of time. For example, between 5 and 10 dollars. Got 12 guests? Write the numbers 1 through 12 on small, individual pieces of paper. Fold in half and place papers in a bowl. Each player pulls a number. Player #1 selects a gift and opens it. The turn is over. Player #2 selects a gift, opens it and then decides if he/she wants to keep the gift or swap the gift with player #1. Player #3 selects a gift, opens it and can swap with #1 or #2. Get it? This continues until the last player has picked a gift. Then player #1 can pick from any of the gifts and the game is over. Ideally there is lots of fighting over gifts and hilarity ensues. Any questions re the rules, email me. ****** UPDATE! I just found this website, www.whiteelephantrules.com.  Easy to understand rules and lots of variations!

Common SNAFU’s: 1. Some idiot brings a ridiculously over priced item. Stupid!cheap wine Then each turn only consists of the current player taking the over-priced item from the player before. No fun at all. 2. Somebody brings a real dog of a present (like a roughly used candle). Whoever gets that clunker has no chance of having it stolen and might as well hang out at the bar. 3. Somebody plays the saint and takes the rotten gifts from the crybabies. Boring! 4. There are way too many people. Gets tedious. No more than 20 people. 5. There are only a few people. Ditto-dullsville. Gotta have at least 8. 6. Somebody is crying and relives past holiday slights. For heaven’s sake why? Drunk? Off her meds? Kick him/her to the curb.

funny christmas giftGifts to Get People Fighting: Lottery tickets, gift cards to good places, funny gifts (yeah, go to MirthinaBox.com), autographed items, good alcohol with great label, something really cool from an antique store. A beautiful book was the coveted prize at the last swap I went to. But it would have to be a humdinger. Certificates for services such as,”I will drive you to the train station on Monday morning” or, “ will pick up coffee 3 days in a row” or if you work in a real estate office,”I will do an open house for you”. Get it?

No Good, Very Bad Gifts: Candles, box of wine, drug store candy, used anything (unless it is ‘vintage’ and really, really cool), homemade items (sorry, crafters!), religious paraphernalia, clothing!

Have you been to a good Yankee Swap? What gifts did people fight over? Do tell!

Ahem! I just aspen to have a super, happy, fun website, MirthinaBox.com, that sells fun and unusual gifts that are PERFECT for Yankee Swaps and gift exchanges. We sell care packages most of the year, but during the holidays we do a brisk business selling stocking stuffers and small gifts!

photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/carbonated/452523685/”>carbonated</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <ahref=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/2.0/”>cc</a>  photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/nickgray/260208130/”>nickgraywfu</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/”>cc</a>

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These Reindeer Jokes Will Sleigh You!

  • What do reindeer say before telling you a joke ? This one will sleigh you !Reindeer
  • Why do reindeer have fur coats? Because they would look silly in Polar fleece jackets!
  • Why don’t you find many reindeer in the zoo? Because they can’t afford the price of admission!
  • How do you make a slow reindeer fast?Don’t feed it!
  • What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees? 
Horn-aments!
  • Which reindeer has the cleanest antlers? 
Comet!

Mirth in a Box is known for their fun care packages but did you know we also have great stocking stuffers?

Gee! I got this great reindeer photo from PhotoPin.com! Thanks! photo credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/22452330@N00/2149680497/”>pipnstuff</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>cc</a>

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